Competition.

I have always kind of had something against the kid in class who tries really hard to suck up to the teacher.

You can spot these students a mile away because they come to class very neatly dressed, sitting right in the front with their trapper keeper(god how i miss those things), and pencil holder.

As soon as i spot them in my class, i brace myself for the long semester ahead of me full of annoying hand raising, unintelligent comments, and the "I'm better than everyone else" smile they get when the answer something remotely right.

I probably have such an aversion to them because it's against everything i am as a student. I mean i know i should talk more...okay...i know i should TALK in class, i know i should show my teachers that i care but I've never been one to bring my teacher an apple or laugh at a lame joke just so i can be on their good side.

There are a couple of them in my class this semester. In Organic Chem, this dude raises his hands so much i almost threw my pencil at him. He is really hyper, moving around in his seat all them time, and i think he may have ADD. Regardless he is still pretty annoying. Case in Point: We have study sections for our Organic Chem class. we meet once a week with about 30 students in a classroom where the TA will go over what may have been confusing in class. We have a quiz every week in this class, but sometimes our TA goes on and on about who knows what, and time will be out before he can give it to us.

This was almost the case on Thursday. I looked at my watch with glee as i saw that we have only 8 minutes left and he was still talking. I put down my pencil, dazed off, scribble some pictures knowing that as long as no one said anything we would not have to take the quiz.

All of a sudden that annoying voice 2 rows over goes "YOU HAVE LIKE 6 MINUTES LEFT. WE HAVE TO TAKE THE QUIZ." I think the whole room did a collective groan, then rolled our eyes, as he sat there smiling. I once again almost threw my pencil at him.

I think my problem with suck ups is that they make it a little harder for the rest of us...particularly me...to make some sort impression on my professor. If everyone else is running up to them with cupcakes/flowers/and their virginity as gifts...who going to remember the quiet girl who writes well. Well no one. I don't suck up but professors generally like me when they get to know me. The suck ups make that a little hard though. I think they are ruining the education system.

Another case in point: JOSH.

I don't know why all the Josh's i have met have been extremely good at English. My English class a year ago had the Jesus Dude(whose name was Josh) who even had me under his spell. And now i have another Josh to deal with . The thing i liked about Jesus Dude was even though he knew EVERYTHING, he was absolutely humble and cool. I mean there was no cocky bone in his body as he answered a question. To me they seemed sincere and honest.

This Josh is the total opposite. He dresses up to class EVERYDAY. I mean there isn't a wrinkle in his clothing, he doesn't wear sneakers he wears this leather shoes. His hair doesn't move because it's perfectly constructed to stay just as he set it.

He has a highlighter, pencil, and pen laid on his desk. He probably gets there like 20 minutes before class starts(unlike a certain someone who couldn't wake up this morning and got there 5 minutes before class started), and sits front and center.

8 o'clock classes are brutal for everyone...including me...so it isn't so shocking that some days you can hear a pin drop we are so dead/tired/hungover/ or daydreaming, but NOT JOSH. He comments on everything, even if it is spelled out in front of him. With his ironed sweater he raises his hand starting with "I don't know of anyone cares, but I'm an ENGLISH MAJOR, so i thought it was interesting...". I mean he starts every sentence like this: "I'm an English Major so Wordsworth words..."

It's so absurd. But my English professor(not the hot one) totally digs him,possibly because he's always talking while the rest of us wipe the drool from our mouths. My English teacher is a weird one to begin with. I already mentioned his preoccupation with the word "professional" but he now, like Josh, has this annoying tendency to say "I don't drink/smoke..."yadda yadda yadda. Apparently he grew up pretty Conservative in Upstate New York(I didn't even know there was still Conservative people in NY). He grew up on a farm, helping his mom and dad, and things like that so he comes from a pretty humble background.

Sometimes it is totally sweet to hear him talk about his hometown. As soon as he begins his "my mom use too..." i suddenly hear Bruce Springsteen playing in that background, and i sit back for one of his stories.

Other times though it can be a little annoying. He talks about how ultra Conservative he is all the time. So when he tries to explain a tough subject like...well i don't know...LIFE, he always go "I don't drink/smoke or do any bad thing like that.". I'm just waiting for the day when he says that premartial sex is wrong, and then i may just have to walk out.

Listen i have never done any of those things either, but it's not how i start to every conversation. I am no moral saint because i don't do "bad" things, i just don't drink or smoke or have premartial sex because...well i don't know,i just don't. Doesn't mean that i wouldn't(well i wouldn't smoke) but i just don't see any need to right now.

Anyway. Back to the issue. I think the professor and Josh may get along so well because deep down i suspect my teacher was once "the annoying kid in class" hence repeated mention on how moral correct he is(i must admit though he doesn't say it in a pompous way).

So after sending my email last week , i think my professor thinks I'm really smart. Possibly even sensible. He was describing sensibility on Friday and it eerily sounded like he was describing me...I mean not directly of course but just in general. He says that a person with sensibility is someone who "soaks up everything around them. They are poets who have a deep sense of the world, and who see the world around them in different way. They can't control it , they just are. They think long and deep about the things they encounter. They are very receptive both mentally and physical and are very sensitive people"

He then added "These are the students who go home after learning something, think deep and hard about things, and questions what is presented before them". I instantly thought "hey that's me", because i was the only one who had sent him an email that week.

But today as he was talking in class about Wordsworth he mentioned that Josh had sent him an email on Sunday. He didn't read it out loud or anything but just mentioned a question josh had asked about nature and Wordsworth poem.He also added "it was a very smart question" as soon as the professor said that I glanced over at Josh, and i swear there was smug smile on his face. Oh we made eye contact, and that smile still remained.

and all i can say is:

IT'S ON.