Alrighty Then.

Waking up today with no foreseeable plans outside of reading a book and finishing the other half of the subway sandwich I bought yesterday is going to be awesome.




The last few days have been busier than I like. And not because I went on a few awesome interviews in the city. I'm still holding out for that.





Le Sad Store is once again short staffed which means I sometimes offer to cover shifts when people call out or are hungover. I usually have Tuesdays and Thursdays off (which I designate Me days) but because of hours being slashed I now have Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursdays off.





Despite money woes I do not mind having three days off. Last week it allowed me to churn out some pretty amazing cover letters to potential employers. I will get a better job. I have no doubt about that (well..sometimes i am doubtful but only because I doubt everything). What I may lack in grace, balance and general upkeep (it's nine, my room is a mess and I still have no idea where my pants are. seriously) I am not a complacent person.





Anxiety is working in my favor job wise. At Le Sad Store you can end up working there for years because it's a comfortable gig. If you have to work in retail Le Sad Store is not a terrible place. The people are nerdy, the hours are flexible, and we spend more time talking to each other than to customers. Don't get me wrong when it sucks it sucks hardcore but it's not the worst place to work.





However, I am a person who will never be comfortable. I am antsy and always on the search for something better. This isn't a healthy way of living. I know this but in regards to getting a better job it's the way of thinking that is driving me to get the hell out of retail.





Until that job gets here though I am slaving away at the store. Monday was Valentine's Day (a holiday I generally adore because of free candy) and everyone was in a bad mood. I completely understand that Valentine's Day is just a campy consumer holiday. I get it. But to spend the whole day sulking and expressing your hate of the holiday is only validating pint up disappointment with it,

It's just a day. An ordinary day and I have no problem participating in the cheesy aspect of it. My mom sent me a valentine's day box (which she does every year) filled with goodies galore. A candy filled bear, The Killers Cd, Garden State and new red chuck taylors! Every year we have made Valentine's day into family day and the box she sent me was awesome.





So needless to say I was in a great mood. Then I get to work where Kat is sulking because she hates valentine's day (despite the boyfriend she never pays attention too). Josh is all sour face because the girl of his dreams (up in cafe) has a boyfriend she will be spending valentines day with and my friend up at the cash register complained the whole night about his girlfriend.





Thanks Guys.





During Kat's "I hate valentine's day" rant she said admitted that Pretty Ricky was starting to get on her nerves. Pretty Ricky, hot preacher guy, recently got married and his thoughts these days are only on his wife. I mentioned the Pretty Ricky, virginal preacher, new attitude towards woman thing to my mom and with the eloquence of Jackie Kennedy she said "he's different because he finally got laid Beckett. Vagina can change a man". God, I love my mom.





Kat says that Pretty only talks about his wife now and complains that Kat is too negative about things (true). I said I never heard him say anything negative about her being negative and like a complete bitch she said "well it's because he actually considers me a friend, unlike some people. That's why he wouldn't come to you". Alright then. Sorry. Go ahead and sulk I don't care anyone.





That night couldn't have ended any quicker after that comment, but Evil Manager asked me if I could come in on my day off to cover a mid shift. Like a true broke person I said I could and spent all four hours of my shift on Tuesday sulking. Now remember that the day before most of the staff was in a bad mood, and I being patient listened to them bitch.





The moment I come in, a little bit down and eager to leave, everyone says I am being too moody and sullen. WTF?!





The shift wasn't that bad and I didn't curse anyone out but it messed with my whole Tuesday routine which I had to do on Wednesday. Needless to say yesterday was a long busy day of running errands and hair appointments. I spent most of the day in the Bronx because the only person who can tame my hair is a hairdresser named Nicole. I spent a good four hours there (3 of them spent waiting) but am happy with the results. Still short but cute. Then I hit up the library for a handful of books and a DVD.



Today is the first day in a week that I do not have any plans. I am ecstatic about this. I have a few writing goals for myself today followed by a viewing of Garden State this afternoon. I do love that movie.





And, my birthday is less than two weeks ago. Last year I sulked hardcore because I had no plans and spent the day in my room crying. I refuse to do so this year. I am going to be 25 years old. Can you believe it? I am planning a Me Day Extravaganza. If the weather isn't too bad I would like to spend my birthday in the city, possibly at a museum or exhibit of some sort. Maybe a bookstore or bakery.





I am open for suggestions. NYC is an amazing place and if there is some place you've been interested in 'seeing' I wouldn't mind going there myself for you and snapping pictures and such. Wow when did this become an interactive journal. But seriously, there may be some hidden gem you've heard of that I have not. March 1st will be a day of exploring the city and I am excited to be taking my birthday celebration in my own hands this year.





Any who, time to clean my room so that I can get some writing and reading done. I've heard all about this David Foster Wallace guy but have yet to read anything by him. I am going to try and make a dent in 'Girl with Curious Hair' today, I've been interested in this read for a while.

~Becks

P.S. How to Breathe Underwater tracklist up! It's the final playlist for this years exchange. Enjoy.