My Boo the Blackberry

Why didn't anyone tell me that  car ownership and driving and like mobility is the greatest thing in the whole entire world? I feel like everyone's just kept this giant secret from me to save me from how horrible public transportation is in comparison.

It's been 9 days since I picked up my car! Her name is The Blackberry and despite being 7 years old and in need of some TLC, I love her. I officially purchased the car September 10th, but I didn't pick her up until last Wednesday because she was kind of in rough shape when we first arrived at the dealership. I was totally okay with waiting a few days for the car while the dealership fixed her up and repaired some obvious problems (e.i, the broken handle on the car). But quickly those days became weeks and I was starting to get super nervous. I got this car at a ridiculous price due to some fuck up by the dealership, so i was worried that they had changed their mind. Doesn't matter that I put down money and signed a bunch of papers, I thought maybe they could still renege on the deal because they realzied how big of a deal this was.

Or maybe, they sold me a effing lemon and it was taking so long to repair because the car was a piece of junk. My first real car was a 96 Mazda. My mom bought it for my brother and I when I was in the 11th grade. I rarely got to drive this car because my brother pretty much claimed it as his own from day one and subsequently put that car through so much hell, it was barely something either of us could drive on the road. My mom spent more money having to fix it (or tow it) that she was more than happy to sell it a few years later for $500. Because I know buying used comes with more cons than pros, I convinced myself after a week of waiting that I purchase a lemon and that the dealership was trying to mask how much of a lemon it really was before I drove off the lot.

In reality, it took so long for me to pick up the car because they had to order the handle which took longer to arrive than any of us thought. Last Sunday I was told that the handle would arrive on Monday and I could pick it up then. Of course Monday rolled around and  I was told the part could come in Tuesday or Wednesday.  It definitely did not come in on Tuesday even though I was prepared to go to the dealership after work alone because Heather was unavailable that day to take me.  The part eventually came in Wednesday afternoon and I was able to pick up my car later in the day.

Since then I've been cautiously driving like a 16 year who just got her license. This is not an exaggeration. I got my actual drivers license a day before moving up to New York and spent the next 8 years walking all over the damn place, using public transportation and/or getting rides from friends. I am the most inexperienced legal driver ever. So while this car thing is very exciting and my car is freaking adorable it still feels..unreal. This feels like a temporary experience instead of an everyday thing. I keep waiting for someone to tell me my week is up and I have to return the car to the rental place or worse it's actual owner.

Of course, it is all mine. I do not have to return her and she is paid off so no one can take her from me but the experience of driving to work and going to the supermarket or even to the library is so...strange. Things don't take as nearly as much time as they used to which of course results in me having more time to do things. It used to take me an hour and 15 minutes to get to work via the bus. Now my trip is 25 minutes top. Since I don't start work until 10am but am usually up at 6:30, I can actually do things in the morning. Or at least that was what I initially told myself. The last couple of days I've just stayed in bed longer instead of i don't know, going for a jog/eating breakfast / making my bed. I've just extended sleep because...obviously.

I am hoping this new found Independence and  great new addition to my life is only some marker of all the great things to come. I've been in such a lull personally, emotionally and mentally these days this car has become a source of light.