You ever get that feeling like you just want to crawl up in a desolate place and hide...well that's exactly how i feel today.
I can't even b.s. happiness... not even on my own blog.
I can't even b.s. happiness... not even on my own blog.
I feel like S*it. My head hurts, my throat hurts, and i want nothing more than to sleep.
Did i mention that i bawled like a baby today.
Along with the cold-like symptoms , i had to face feedback on my personal essay from my professor ( i don't even want to call him Mr. McSleepy/ McDreamy/McNothing...i dislike him so much)
He tore my anxiety paper up like a f*cking madman.
"my langauge is too romantic"
"talk more about what anxiety looks like not what it feels like"
"you're writing is too abstract"
Along with these critiques he littered my paper with scribble scrabbles , like some child drawing on important papers.
I don't think i should have written about anxiety. My problems with anxiety is that i fear being exposed, all the vulnerability and insecurity out there for everyone to see.
And i realize now after turning in my paper, that's exactly what i did.
I couldn't contain the tears today, feeling emotionally drained after writing the stupid paper, and then devastated by his comments.
I don't know what to do, there isn't a hole big enough for me to hide in this time.
2 comments:
Ohhhh...that is so not good. I'm sorry, sweetie. It is so hard to put yourself "out there", then get ripped up by it. I hope you get to feeling better physically, soon, and the rest? Get thee to the therapist? Although I'm not sure even that would help right now. May just take time. So sorry again. That sucks.
okay, sweetpea, after i get done hugging you i'm going to go tear Professor McDipshit's balls off.
""talk more about what anxiety looks like not what it feels like"
WHAT was the assignment? and why would any writing instructor EVER give this kind of feedback? It sounds like you were "showing" and he wants you to go back to fifth-grade "telling."
that line alone tells me this guy is a serious pigfucker.
i would love to read your narrative. i know you're feeling shitty and not-like-sharing, but i would really, really like to read this piece and see what the fuck is wrong with this asshole professor.
all of those comments? if i was writing those on a student's paper, i would be delighted. because it meant the student was really reaching, really doing something extraordinary. (actually, i'd never write those comments. they seem like the work of a small-minded individual).
since i suggested this topic - ouch - i feel a bit responsible.
and please, please, send me a copy of the paper. I'll give you better fucking feedback than Professor Pigfucker did. i don't even have to read it to know he's nuts.
i believe he needs julian's ultimate punishment: WEASELPANTS.
one case of weaselpants to Prof. Dipshit. One metric shit-ton of Hugs to Beckett.
your writing is good. please send me a copy of this piece!
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