Falling into Place.

Moving day was yesterday.

My mother and I headed out early yesterday, with a buttload of things I had accumulated during the summer, and drove back to my school. Even though she will have done the "drop your child off to college" thing for a record 5 times( 5 semesters including Philadelphia University ) she never stops getting completely sad when she has to drop me off.

The whole way to campus she was getting way nostalgic about our time together. I'm use to this though, and secretly I wished to get nostalgic with her too. There is always that feeling before going back to school where I wish I could stay at home with her too. That it was like highschool, junior high, and elementary where I could return home to her after a day at school. Something about the safety of being home I guess.

Because my brother is...Well unreliable, we had to do without him and lug all the heavy things by ourselves. It actually went faster than we expected and I was in my dorm with all my things in less than 2 hours. One of my roommates greeted us as we unpacked. She seems nice, but appearances can be deceiving, and my mom was pleased that she wasn't some rude nutbag we have encountered before.

My room is of course smaller than last years, and summer session, but it has a charm to it that makes up for it, plus I have a killer view, and we all know it's about the view in the end.

Being back is very bittersweet. I am on the right track to getting caught up with my classes, but at the same time I notice how everyone else has seemed to fall right back into the routine of their lives, friends, hangouts, while I am just left...Alone. A reflection of my time spent here.

The halls are alive with friends happy to see each other, talking about the gossip of past weeks, and what classes and teachers they are trying to avoid. After my mom left, I was pretty much on my own. There were no catching up moments with friends, there were no recognizable faces to wave at, or people to escape with. It was just me in the comfort zone I think I am beginning to out grow.

Realizing that I want so much more than what I have now, makes me more determined, yet scared, to make things better. I wish I knew how to though.

Classes start Thursday and I am taking...Ecology, Calculus, Chem, Engl, and a psych class. Doesn't sound fun but what can I say, I have no other choice but to make it work, study my ass off, and pass.

Today I started working out again, with the whole moving situation and dealing with my brother, I didn't do anything during July, unless you count eating strawberry cheescake as exercise.

Physically 20 has been beneficial on the bod, there's a healthy glow to my face, and I slimed down considerably during the month of June. But today's workout killed me, 20 minutes here and there felt like death to my legs, and I was ready to go after minute 5, but I stayed(mainly caused I had walked in the heat and there is air conditioning in the gym).

Hopefully the positive injections into my life will be beneficial in the long run. Working out, figuring out this whole social thing, and not feeling so miserable all the time. I'm not making any expectations of what the semester holds for me, but I do hope it is something grand.

Time to sleep, horrible storm knocked out TV last night and I missed Flavor of Love 2. Damn.