Working Girl

My computer battery is dying (for the second time in 2 years) so I've limited my computer usage until i can swing by Best Buy and order a new one. Luckily I have the warranty this time.

I am still sad about my cats, but my avoidance technique has prevented me from crying at work or at my Aunt's house. I use to hold grudges like no other, and my mom figured I would never talk to her again (which often crossed my mind). But i forgave a couple of hours later, though I wanted to cry and be angry all day.

I still want to cry and be angry all day, but I don't think that will get me anywhere.

In other news....I may have an internship after all!! After a two week wait and no word from the editor I emailed her back to ask if the position was still opened (that's called initiative). A few hours later she said that the intern position was still open but that i would have to read a manuscript she received a week ago, critique it, and write up a synopsis of the story along with whether or not this story should be published.

I was so excited. I mean here is my big chance to get into publishing. Here is my big chance to get the ball rolling on my career. So I opened the manuscript attachment she put in the email...and this is literally one of the worst stories I have ever read in my whole entire life. It's actually 415 pages of the worst stories i have ever read in my life.

I am slowly plowing through it, and I have no choice but to finish it today so I can email her my critique before the deadline. I have complained about this story several times to my mom (withholding some info because I don't know how the confidentiality thing works). But my complaints about the story (long, boring, unrealistic) are really just masking how excited I really am.

I have often heard that when you get into publishing you don't really read a whole lot of good stories. Often times you are stuck reading more garbage then anything else. But to me there is something interesting and exciting about the one story you do come across that stirs your interest. So far this book is not the one. It's convoluted, strange and unrealistic (let's say that there was a huge power outage in the whole world, turning big cities into a wasteland of crime and gangs. How then, in a 20 year span could there be a miraculous evolution of people into these half man half beast animals. I wasn't a biology major for too long, but I covered evolution. And i think it takes a lot longer than 20 years).

I know i was probably sent the suckiest story of the whole bunch, to see how I would deal with it. Even though she said that i didn't have to read the whole story (should it but good awful. Which it is) I am determined to finish all 415 pages. Which is a goal I can accomplish because I'm almost done. Now i just have to write about my report about why this book should never published. Not an easy task when phrases like "this shit is garbage" cannot be used.

I want this internship so bad. And as long as my report is good, I should be in the running for something. Let's hope. Work is not really fulfilling, and I want to meet people in my field. So I have the creative artsy feeling again. I miss it.

Time to finish this story.