Is Christmas Over Yet?

Seriously.

Though I have a budget for myself this Christmas year, I still feel like I have spent a lot of money on...nothing. My first paycheck since Thanksgiving lasted all but a day (thanks to McAbs bailing on me because he couldn't get me the microwave he promised, forcing me to shelve out 50 dollars) and since then I have bought presents for my mom and Marie. Not a lot of presents. I kind of forgot Marie's birthday so to make it up to her I made her a 'romance box'. I mailed her 3 romance books, a box of caramel, almond joy (inside joke based on a specific romance novel she read), pj's and slippers. I then got the usual for my mom; movie, cd, cookbook, and other odds and ends.

I wish I could have spent more. But December is coming to a close, rent approaches, and I am trying to hold on to all of my money. Christmas isn't helping.

It's not that I hate the holidays, but damn it all to hell, for one day out of the year people get all crazy for secret deals and a day of opening presents. Were it not for the spending money part, this Christmas would be okay. But I won't be home for the holidays, I am as broke as broke can get, and I am anxious about the next few months.

Life.

After sending a Dear John letter to my internship, I felt a sense of "what the fuck am I doing". Yes, that internship was not right for me but in all honesty, at this rate, no internship may be right....especially if I am not getting paid for my awesome skills. I re-applied to the Nonion yesterday because they are looking for interns for the Winter/Spring 'semester'. This could be a long shot or at least a nice second chance.

I get paid today (yeah!) and this time my spending will be under control. All i need is food and water and maybe a luxury item or two (those caramels I bought Marie looked delicious). I can't wait for Christmas to be over.