The Pageant of the Bizarre

You know the saying "I woke up on the wrong side of the bed", well it was the total opposite for me today, I woke up on the very good side of bed and that feeling continued throughout the day.

This weekend was suppose to be spent studying for my math exam and bio exam this week. The first being the Bio exam. But of course it was another restful weekend, where I stayed in bed and watched Home Alone eating marshmallows out the bag. I forgot how good marshmallows and Home Alone 1 are.

Needless to say I didn't get to bed until 1, feeling kind unsure about how i would do on the test today.

But I woke up confidant, heading to class with notes in hand trying to cram everything down, and when i got to class I waited patiently along with 100 and some odd kids for the professor to come. And we waited. And waited. and waited.

10 minutes past when the test should have been handed out and I should have been struggling with my confused face, he walks in. NO TEST IN HAND. The night before he was suppose to give a study session, but he forgot. Apparently he thinks a study session is necessary before every test, and because he forgot to show up for it...He Moved the test to Wednesday. That has never, ever, ever happened, and after we all kind of stared at each other like "is he serious" we relaxed, threw our notes in our bookbag, and nearly kissed the ground he walked on.

So I get at least another day to procrastinate...Sweet.

After class I ran to the bookstore because I had forgotten to buy one of the books for English that we have to read. Hoping beyond hope that they would still have it I headed into the book store right into the path of Waldo(AKA stalker I haven't seen for a while), but I couldn't turn back, I really needed the book. So after doing some James Bond ducking( what I am talking about James Bond walks right in the face of danger) I thought I had escaped him. Yeah but I forgot stalkers always find you.

So as I am waiting for the dude to tell me if they have the book in stock, Waldo taps me on the shoulder. I say hey politely and return back to the dude. Waldo says something like "well then" and kind of walks away. The dude tells me they don't have the book, but they may have it in Barnes and Nobel(which is where our college bookstore is located. Yeah a Bookstore within a bookstore). I turn around to go search for the book in Barnes and there's Waldo right beside me.

Waldo: what have you been up to. I haven't seen you in a while...I am studying new things....Rome, the Classics.

Me: really, that's nice

Then he goes on to ask me all these history questions. Like when did you become a history expert. Who was the first...yadda yadda yadda? Kind of crap. I don't even think he knew the answer, he just wanted to ask it. So after I keep saying "I have no idea", he suddenly gets all excited

Waldo: Man I want to hang out with you so bad!!!!
Me: that's nice, but I have been really busy this semester, and will be busy these next couple of weeks.

I head off to the fiction section, Waldo quick on my heels, I'm rambling about really needing to find this book, so he will get the hint and leave me alone. He ask me how old I am, I answer. Unfortunately I do not look like a 20 year old, I don't think I have ever looked like my real age( I'd card myself in a bar). He then calculates his age from my age and seeing that there is only a three year difference continues on with his conversation. He still doesn't get the hint to leave and out of know where he says "I have an urge...". My heart stop and my mind began racing wondering what the hell kind of urge he was feeling:

Please don't feel me up, please don't feel me up, god where are the cops or a strong burly man when you need one. I could attempt to kick him in the balls I hear that hurts, but he could easily drag me out of here very pissed that I kicked him in his tenders. I really should stop calling it tenders I'm not 4 and the definition of tender wouldn't really describe...Okay maybe I could make a run for it, shit that would look pretty weird, and I can't scream that would draw attention and he could total be this nice, possibly slow, guy who works upstairs and who has an urge to I don't know....Please don't feel me up .

Waldo: I have an urge to ask you to be my girlfriend
Me: What? I didn't catch that(totally caught what he was saying, hoping he had meant to say "I have an urge for you to meet my Girlfriend")
Waldo: I have an urge to ask you to be my girlfriend

I didn't want to tell him, I would never date him. Or that I didn't even know his name. That me and Mike laugh at the absurdity of him during math, or that I am kind of scared of him. He had enough balls to ask me out, more balls(or tenders) than I could ever had. So I did generic girl thing

Me: "I'm kind of seeing someone, but thank you(yes I said thank you) it is very nice of you to take an interest.

After I said it held my breath, because he kind of looked at me like he possibly knew I was lying. And I felt any sudden movement would show the truth. But he shrugged said okay and that he still wanted to hang out with me.

M*therF*cker. Why do i attract the freaks

It must be the green t-shirt I was wearing today. Maybe it brightens up my face or something, because today was one of those days where I felt the eyes on me, and didn't know why. From Waldo to men in subway, it was like a starefest and I feared I had put on the weird Madonna bra again.

Whatever it was I felt good today, I smiled at cute boy in library, I didn't f up in lab, I felt confident in my skin for once I was...Okay. I was secure and without the feeling of anxiety. It was weird, ever since the cry fest on Wednesday, and having to make sense of the house of anxiety, I feel like my head is becoming clearer, like I'm moving towards something, because I am getting further away from the thing holding me back.

And mean trust me i don't think i'm cured, but i have located where the wound is and am beginning to tend to it. And maybe i will continue to be okay for a while.

If that makes any sense at all.

I know it won't last long, but for today it was pretty neat. To feel like a sexy smart chick, apparently with an imaginary boyfriend, who looks awesome in her green Chicago shirt.

I need to wear green more often, I might be able to reel in a real catch one of these days; boy in library, smart kid in psych. Who knows.