Falling 'In Like".

I met a guy yesterday. A beautiful interesting guy. He name is Julian and I think I seriously might like him. Not in an imaginary '' I've put him on a pedestal way' but in the real way.

I was working at the cash register last night when Julian asked me a question about return policies. He was sort of lingering around because i was resting my head on the counter making it completely impossible to see me. When I lifted my head he made some joke as to him 'wondering briefly why a bookstore would have no one working at the register'. It was corny but funny and I explained that I didn't really like being up there but I volunteered.

He wanted to know about the return policies and after my by the book explanation he said thanks and offered me his hand...so I could give him a high five. Yes, I haven't given a legit high five in a very long time but Julian was cute and I was bored so I swung my hand in his direction and made contact with his open palm.

He came back a few minutes later with a brown leather bound journal with horrible bulky paper. It didn't have a barcode on it and he wanted to know if I could scan it and tell him the price. I was eating skittles at the time (which I am not suppose to do up at cash wrap) which I noted to him, as I struggled to speak with a red skittle in my mouth. The journal turned out to be 43 dollars. We both looked at each other as if it were a ridiculous amount and I mentioned that he was better off getting a Moleskin.

He said it's the journal he always uses because he is writing a novel but he couldn't find the journals in the store. Holy Shit. As soon as he said he was writing a novel, I blurted out that I was writing a short story. Luckily the Moleskin journals were located in talking distance of the cash register and we spent the next 10 minutes talking about writing. At this point I realized that Julian was very pretty (or I guess hot). I mean clearly he was a college student (beanie, book bag, philosophy book) but hot nonetheless. He told me about his story and I sort of told him about my short story while we raved about the efficiency of a moleskin journal.

Just as things were getting good I had to ring up a couple of customers. Shit. This took forever and by the time I was done I didn't know where Julian had gone. Of course he was still in the corner near the moleskins and we resumed our conversation. I liked Julian a lot. He was going on and on about writing and I don't even remember half of it but i told that he was cool and that I liked him and his writing stuff. Yeah, I said that out loud. Kill me know. When he left, I was sort of sad that I didn't have his number or at least his full name.

Why I can't I met more guys like that, preferably ones who are a little older then hot Julian (I think he was 19/20. Too young for me) but still with the nice artsy sort of vibe. I left thinking of our encounter all night and woke up thinking of it too. I am totally in like with him, I forgot how much I missed that feeling.

Anyway, enough of that...

One whole month until writing stuff is do. I have a story, a legit one, that I have been working on for days. I am so nervous and antsy at this point but I have to channel that energy and "Make It Work" as Tim Gunn would say. My boss freaked out yesterday when I told her of my plans. She suggested applying to a school in the area ( so I could work at the bookstore when I could). Decisions are hard to make but in regards to grad school just going alone is the right decision. I have realized that I can't write here. I mean some people can but it's too much for. The fact that everyone is writing. That everyone feels the sense of entitlement over their work, even when it sucks, bothers and stifles me to no end

I'd rather go away for 2 years, write away at my old school or at Chatham Unversity and just be in the craft. I have so much to learn and I am excited about being able to do so but I know I don't want to write here. It's just not for me.

Time to write. I have a crap load of things to do in a short amount of time.

Oh, and I am seriously obsessed with this band and song.