Maybe I should have really read the novel Pride and Prejudice. Jane Austen may be on to something when it comes to the nature of courtships.
Yesterday at work I was standing at customer service with Kat, Matt and Josh. We were talking about Halloween, and the shenanigans we were going to get into that night (does taking your 5 year old cousin count as shenanigans)when the phone rang. Since no one else seemed too excited to answer, I grabbed the line and dealt with the person on the other end.
By the time I got off the phone, the three were already engaged in another topic and had capped off the conversation with a joke where everyone but me laughed.
There is a thing you should know about me. Something I have never admitted on this journal before. I am sort of embarrassed about this but here it goes:
I am really bad at jumping in the 'middle' of things. Conversations, jokes, jump ropes, television shows. It's sort of an embarrassing and quirky trait.
I noticed this deficiency when I was a kid. I use to watch Ghostwriter (a PBS kids detective show) during dinner and was obsessed with the kid crime related drama. We had two TVs in the dinning room because my family use to watch the ABC family line up during dinner, except for me. I'd freak out if I missed an episode of my prized show.
Anyway, one night I got to the TV too late and missed the first 10 minutes of the show. Of course the 10 minutes include the initial mystery solving dilemma (the setup). For the next 20 minutes I couldn't figure out the story line to save me. I couldn't jump into the show after the commercial break and retrieve information on what transpired earlier.
So anytime I miss small chunks of situational information, I get lost and flustered. Don't watch an episode of Law and Order with me if I've missed the first 15 minutes. I will spend the rest of the show complaining that I can't figure out what the hell is going on. I could never play double dutch a school because I jumping into two rotating ropes is confusing as hell. And ugh, if I miss the setup of a really hilarious joke you can bet the punch line is going to fall flat.
There I've said it. Feels good.
My mom thinks this trait of mine is hilarious and so does Marie. The look on my face as I try to decipher missed information has been described as priceless and I'm pretty entertained by this myself. I've come to accept it.
So when Matt, Kat and Josh started to laugh and I was the only one who didn't follow, I brushed it off. Immediately I say: 'oh no, i missed something. I don't get it. confused now' and begin to walk away from them. But then Matt, says 'you do that a lot. You know. I'm starting to worry that things are just going through one ear and out the other'.
SAY WHAT? Excuse me?
But he continued:
'when i talk to you sometimes, you get a glazed look on your face and I wonder if you are paying attention at all. Seriously...'
SAY WHAT?! Times Two
I think he just called me absent-minded. Absent-minded. I am not absent-minded MATT. What the hell! I immediately got very defensive and retorted 'glazed over, I'm not five! I just didn't catch what you guys were saying'. Gosh.
Is it wrong that after that criticism, my small crush catapulted out the window and landed in a fiery pit of absent-minded fluff. I know, it is a little shallow on my part. But, being called absent-minded is not my idea of a guy showing interest in little ol' me. I don't care how sparkly my eyes are. Maybe they are sparkly because there are so glazed over from my absent minded tendency.
I mean, he's not that great of a writer (though he loves showing me his work) but I've never said in a conversation 'you're no Hemingway', especially in front of other people. I guess I'm a tad bit sensitive about personal criticism. So he didn't use the word 'absent-minded'. But the tone was very condescending, especially because he said it in front of the other two to get a reaction, as if that particular habit of mine was 'bothersome' to him.
I don't understand boys. At all.
This has potentially ended before it even started.
4 comments:
aw, no! i think he was trying to get your attention. I mean, trying to make sure you were paying attention to HIM. Replay that conversation through the lens of "I like this girl but I'm totally insecure and also she seems like she's not that interested and kind of zones out on me is she even listening when I talk to her?"
make allowances for other people's shitty social skills.
Give the lad another chance. A real chance, where you initiate an outing together or some such. At least create an opportunity for potential kissyface, to see if there's anything there.
Absent-minded, in my book, is a compliment anyway; it means you've got better things to think about than the mundane shit you're surrounded by.
I think i was so taken aback by the comment because i've been called absent minded before and it's was meant in a negative light.
Argh. I'm not always sure what he is thinking. I mean one moment i catch him starring at me from afar and the next he is calling me absent-minded. So i'm getting all sorts of mixed signals.
I'm suppose to hang out with him and another friend tomorrow. I was kind of going to bail but if he reminds me of the tentative plans today i'll go.
potential kissyface would be kinda nice.
Okay, I don't usually post comments on other people's blogs (this is the first time, I guess), but I've been reading your blog for a while now and I really need to jump in here...
As Kittens said, maybe, just maybe, was he referring to the fact that he very obviously made a move and showed you he liked you and you didn't respond in the way he thought you would. I bet he had passionate kissing scenarios in his head or something, but instead, you just go on treating him as usual (he said you have pretty eyes, FGS, that's guy code for "I'm head over heels in love with you!")...
Make a move (I know that's easier said than done, I'm the same way with guys) - I'm not saying you should walk up to him and make his imaginary scenario happen, but at least try to show him you like him.
Just my 2 cents.
I agree with kittens not kids and little girl in wonderland. i don't think you should write him off just yet.
And also, you SHOULD read Pride and Prejudice!
"Absent-minded, in my book, is a compliment anyway; it means you've got better things to think about than the mundane shit you're surrounded by." I love that!
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