Drawing Blanks

Another useless day. My mom came and picked up most of my things. The room is looking very bare, which is freaking me out.

When I took art in elementary school, my weird teacher would always say "draw a picture, but it has to cover the whole paper, I don't want to see any white on the paper." This was then followed by her walking around the classroom checking out our "art" and pointing out where we could fill the paper in with more color.

I guess ever since then I fear a blank canvas. Somewhere I know she is still teaching and yelling to fill the whole sheet of paper with color to some scared children.

Things are quiet here. I kind of hate that feeling. I escape into this room to get away from the noise, and now there is no noise to escape. Everyone is preparing to leave and go back home. I'm kind of stressed about going home. Today I stupidly went to Princeton Review.com and once again was reminded of how much I don't know about what I plan to do with the future if plan A doesn't work out.

It's just been one of those days. Like I'm tired but I can't sleep. I'm hungry but I don't really want to eat. I want to walk outside but I just want to hide. Maybe it's just Spring. I've always been a fan of Fall. Cold. Leaves Changing. Falling. The spring is so Springy. I was so much happier yesterday when it was raining. I think I should consider moving to Washington. Doesn't it always rain there.?


I have two classes tomorrow and then the rest of the week to "study". But without any life in this room its beginning to drive me crazy and I may have to study in the bookstore.

And as I was walking to get my mother and brother( and my brothers new puppy dog friend who my mom says we have inadvertently adopted from around the corner) so they could help me bring some of my stuff down I encountered Naked Boy Cheeks(and tube socks). He emerged from a room near the exit exposing his naked cheeks as I quickly averted my eyes, and headed downstairs. While I was passing naked boy cheeks he seemed to have no shyness and continued to remain in the hallway looking at me as if I was the undressed one.

Luckily when my mother, brother, and Puppy dog came upstairs Naked Boy had escaped back to whatever Naked Cave he came from and has yet to be seen.

More pics from around the campus above. Yesterday while I was snapping the flower pics another pimpish guy came strutting my way. Clearly I have potential call girl written all over me. Young, innocent, and fresh faced. I tried to avoid turning back to see him when he approached me in mid shoot.

pimpish Guy: Hey how you doing

Me: ??????

Pimpish Guy: Do you want a new friend

Me: I have plenty of friends thank you.

Pimpish: You don't like meeting new people

Me: I've heard that a lot actually. No I just am trying to take pictures...Alone....

Pimpish: Oh come on. Whats on your mind friend.

[now grant it if he wasn't so pimpish and disheveled looking the mere fact that he asked me what was on my mind may have drawn me in. I like when guys ask me what I am thinking]

Me: At the present moment picture taking.

Pimpish: Do you have a name, and a phone number

Me: My name is Beckett, but I don't...Have...Phones...Are tricky, phones...I don't have one...Number.(embarassing)

Pimpish: Well Beckett(stressing my name as if somehow I said my own name wrong), I'm Collin. Nice to meet you

Me: Same here, sorry I couldn't give you my phone number but thanks for asking.(what a dork and i'm not talking about the pimpish guy)

And the pimp dude walks away looking for a new fresh face to hit on.

The things I have to put up with to take a couple of pictures in the rain.