Daylight Robbery

Grounded.

The worst thing about being so elated is that reality brings you back down to earth with everyone else.

Last night was amazing. A little euphoric even. So I was still completely awkward in social situations. I marveled at the people who had come to the outdoor concert(FREE concert I may add) alone and were dancing and clapping, and taking pictures. Having a generally good time.

For some reason I am not comfortable doing that yet. I look around as if expecting a friend to come up behind me and tap me on the shoulder, but turning around I am instead met face to face with some stranger.

After a while though I wasn't so tense. His performance was amazing and I gazed at him, amongst the people in front of me, wishing I was on stage with him. Or that I was the piano. (Can anyone explain why tall people stand right in front of short people. Like they move all the way up to the front, just to make it difficult for the short girls behind them).

I left at around 8, and headed back to my dorm to study for two very important exams. Chem and psych. Those bitches were not easy today. I grasped all the concepts, studied my ass off this weekend(sometimes without the TV), I read the book, took the notes, calculated the calculations, and yet after being handed the 11 paged exam, my mind went completely blank. Like I had suddenly become the 2nd grade Beckett, with my pink power converse(oh yeah...I rocked converse shoes even then), who could only concept anything past 2nd grade math. It was like gibberish on a page, and I instantly wanted to cry for my Mommy.

Okay it wasn't that bad, but you get the point, it wasn't terribly easy. Especially after I thought I did a fine job studying for it. Psych wasn't that bad. Though on one of the question she wanted us to describe the physiological property of the drugs heroin and cocaine(don't ask). For some reason I thought it said physical properties, so thinking "I've watched enough cops" I confidently put down

"Crack is a white substance, commonly referred to as rock. It can be snorted(if crushed and made into a powdery substance) or injected in the arm from being heated on a spoon and using a needle".

After looking at the question(realizing the word was physiological) and my answer(realizing it may look like I knew first hand what the physical properties were) I quickly erased my answer and put a more appropriate one down. THANK GOD. She may have referred me to counselor had I left it.

All in all, I am exhausted, my brain cannot take in anymore school work. My body wants to collapse on bed, cuddle my blanket and listen to music. For as long as I want. For as long as the memory of the two exams fade from my mind, or/and existence.

OH....

Tuesday Me and Mike headed to this new cafe place on campus. They supposedly serve really good food, and because we got out of math early I told him to show me the place he wouldn't shut up about.

Our friendship...Is...very weird. I mean when I'm not wanting to run away from him, I like having him around. PLATIONICALLY of course. Whatever the case, we make the best of our friendship. We amuse each other, curse and argue while in math, and then head our separate ways. Just the way I like it.

But on Tuesday as we waited in line and talked about Heroes, the cashier smiled at us. I thought nothing of it, as I went to go look at what they were serving but as I turned my head back I heard her say "Are you two dating". I looked at Mike and he giggled and said no nicely. She couldn't stop there though "you should ,it would nice."

WHO THE HELL ARE YOU LADY? WHAT THE HELL DOES THAT MEAN. Of course I didn't say that but I turned my head and pretended like I didn't hear anything and so did he. And then we awkwardly talked for five minutes and made our quick exit.

Since then he has called more in the last two days than since I have known him. He calls to talk about math, asking if I can help him with a problem but then goes on to tell me how to do it. And then we talk about something stupid before getting off the phone.

AND TODAY....We go to my favorite roof top retreat and talk(he has to do a kissing scene for his acting class), laugh( at mean girl in math), and play a vicious game of UNO. OH yeah...UNO. I had a pleasant ti---NO NO NO---what is going on here. Stupid lady at shop putting ideas into people's head. Not my head of course, I would never---ever---EVER---consider Mike anything other than a friend. FRIEND. friend.

But I did have a good time. And I was even tempted to go to coffee place again with him after English. AS FRIENDS. who like to play Uno.

Friends. Right?

My head hurts