Warning the next post will be about Bra's. Particularly a bra I got for a gift. If you are at all offended my bra's and what are contained in them, I sincerely apologize. I don't have an affinity for talking about my bra or what is in them, but it is a pivitol part of the story. You've been warned.
My mom tries very hard to inject some of the feminine things to me. It's not that I shun being girly, it's just that I'm not annoying about it. I don't squeal when I see a nice purse, shopping is a hassle, and I like T-shirts and jeans.
"Cute" is in my vocabulary but not when describing clothes. Nonetheless, she makes a habit of going into stores and buying me bra's and underwear that should never see the light of day or night. I figure since she bought them I minus well put them to use, but that is usually only on dirty laundry day.
Even though I will be at school for only a month, I didn't see the big deal of bringing a whole lot of clothes. My mother, didn't think so. And did the "backseat packing" for me. She happened to pack those bra's I haven't even attempted to wear.
That was until today. What a bad idea.
So these bra's are the biggest things I have ever seen. After looking, examining, and then wondering why there seemed to be a little cushion in the front, I decided to give it a go and head out into the world.
As I passed the mirror I noticed I was looking a little...How do I put it....HUGE. I did a double take and literally was like "where did those things come from." I dropped my bookbag, headed back to my room and decided that I needed to change, but looked at the time and saw I had 15minutes to make it all away to the other side of campus, and maybe I was exaggerating.
If anyone has seen Madonna in the Cones outfit, that is how I looked. It was like Marilyn Monroe just without the really short skirt and wind.
I put the "you are looking a little busty today" Behind me, think I was just being self conscious, maybe I had shrunk the t-shirt, trying to ignore the fact that this gift was a little to big and pointy for me.
So the whole day I am getting stares. I was thinking "wow maybe I look extremely cute today, and boys are finally starting to notice". I of course couldn't even zip up my normally fitted jacket because of cone bra. 20 weird stares later and the end of class, I am walking to the bookstore where some 13 year old, who is visiting the school with his camp or something, nearly knocks me off the sidewalk by crashing into the cone bra he was staring at. Katherine also notice, and was a little jealous by the attention I was getting. At this point, pointy bra, I am still not considering is the factor to all the stares from men.
So I head to the library to get look in a mirror. I want to see what everyone has been staring at all day. That has made men turn their heads towards me, and knock into me. Could it be my gorgeous face? My eyes, my nose, or maybe my lips. My skin is glowing today, the new moisturizer must be working? No
First glimpse I get of myself and I have these Huge boobs staring back at me, nearly knocking me in the chin, and they clearly aren't mine. Cone bra has traveled so high up, I look like a pornish pinup girl. The size of the things are only enhanced because my jacket won't close, so I've been wearing it half zip, making cone bra and boobs look all inviting.
I looked like I was nursing, those things were so huge.
After making the "Where the hell did these come from again" face. I made a quick exit out of the library, holding a notebook to my chest and headed back to my dorm. As soon as I got back, that bra was off quicker then ever, and discarded deep, deep in my drawer.
My mom laughed harder then I've heard her laugh, of course at my embarrassment. The things were a 36C and PADDED!!!!
I would like to report that things have since returned to normal. A size decrease and paddless bra later, cone shaped boobs are no more.
Now I must go back and hide in embarrassment.
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