"Beckett, You are Wise...."

Were the words written on my English essay from my professor. Every Tues and Thursday in class, we have these free writes and she gives us something to write about and then we have to respnd without stopping or thinking about what we say. I guess she likes what i write because she gives me a lot of check ++'s, which she says is rare and only gives them out when we have wowed her. I never thought i wowed anyone before. I've been called wise a lot of times, and i notice that i don't give myself as much credit as i know i am. I'm kind of hard on myself, i don't know why but people see things in me that i don't, and maybe i need to see the beauty in myself first before the world can see it in me.

We are doing group work this next week where we have to analyze poems and write up the outline for the poems. There are six groups, each with a poem, and each poem corresponds with each other ( well each poem has a reply to it). Me and Mike ended up in different groups, but close enough that he can talk to me without us yelling across the room. Out poems are the corresponding poems and next week we are both the speaker. The poems are The Passionate Shephard and his Love, and The Nymph's reply to the Shephard. Of course i am the poem with the Nymph title. To sum it up quickly In The shepard poem, he is asking his mistress to move in with him, he is offering all these things that will draw her in , because he loves her so much. The nymph replies, that if love were young, and always to be in an enduring state than the idea of them living together would be great. But reality crushes that, promises are things that don't live up, and disappointment is soon to follow. Oh, how i connect with the nymph and i was more than a little happy to get that poem.

I think it's funny how we both have to present a poem which correspond with each other. So while he does his speech of the shephard declaring his love and devotion for the Nymph, i will talk about our poem and the rejection she crushes on the Shephard. Sweet irony i tell you. I'll be able to say what i think about Mike in the form of my describing the Nymph. I believe Friendships are Relationship, just without the hand holding, kissing, and other mushy stuff. And ours is a weird one built around the assumption of greatness, but in reality is just a neurotic mess tha leaves me tired. Public speaking doesn't bother me that much, which is weird cause i rarely speak in class. I took speech in High School and to the shock of my teacher who had basically brided me to at least say a word a day, if not talk, i took to public speaking pretty well. Though i don't like competing so i dropped out of his Speech club, speaking in class was enough.

Filming starts Saturday, and i not happy with the prospect of waking up on a Saturday early to get to some shoot, where i just decorate, hopefully they will let me go home early. I mean if i'm just decorating whats the use of keeping me all day, why couldn't child labor laws follow us into adulthood. I mean they have to let me go sometime don't they.

In Biology class, i sit behind a kid with a mullet/rat tail. I can't help but stare at it, as if my life is flashing before my eyes. All i can think is "this is one smart kid, but why the mullet/rat tail" I mean he is really smart, out of +3oo students he always answers the question but not in the annoying way, like some other kid who shouts out the wrong answer. I'm starting to think his mullet retains his smartness, like without the mullet he would know nothing. Must get his name, so i can stop referring to him as dude with mullet.

I am suppose to be going to this movie club thing tonight. But like most things i have idea what building it is in. I love how when you ask someone where it is, they either scrunch up their faces because they have never heard of it before, or give you directions that further have you confused. Seeing that it is at 7pm, and i don't really want to be wandering around at night for a building i may never find, Mike agreed on showing me tomorrow where it is(b/c filming is in that building also), so i can either wait for the next movie or search for it now. They are playin La Femme Nikita, and i don't even think it's the french version. Not that i don't like Brigett Fonda( i think that is who was in it), but the French version is just better and more raw. Enough movie talk, i need a nap.